I leaned over her, a bit worried. I looked over at the dog, now flat on her belly with her paws over her nose. She wasn’t scratching at the Halti (the halter which covers the bridge of her nose and encourages good behavior - if she jumps or makes a hard turn, it pinches a … Continue reading “What on earth is the matter with the dog?” my mother asked, concerned.
Me: Puppy? What’s wrong? Dog: I feel like hell. We’d noticed the dog was not her usual self on Sunday - she was flat out and kinda mopey. I’d thought it was because she’d had an awesome play date Saturday with another dog, but no… Cat, as usual going from calm to hysterical in seconds: … Continue reading Can I have two aspirin? Moaned the dog, And a heating pad?
Blondie: What? I’m kind of working here. Why aren’t you on your way home? Me: We were… I mean, we are. We’ve loved spending the past few days with you and BB (Blondie's Beau), but I need to tell you what I sprung on him at the last minute. Blondie: Oh, god. Let me back … Continue reading I need to tell you something, I said.
No, it’s not, I said. Yes it is, shouted the hound. We gotta get OUT of here!! Puppy… we’re in church. It’s Easter. That’s incense, not smoke, and while I agree it’s smelly, nothing’s going to hurt us. She was still uncomfortable with the idea so halfway through the first hymn we exited the building. … Continue reading Fire! Screamed the dog. The building’s on fire!!
That’s actually apropos of nothing, but my mother said that’s the kind of book that would grab my aunt’s attention and cause her to read it. She evidently likes intriguing starts. So Beloved wasn’t completely enthusiastic about my latest musical endeavor (I tend to make up songs, and what I lack in artistic ability I … Continue reading “Hell…” said the dog, as she climbed into bed…
I raise my head off the pillow and looked over at Beloved. “It’s 38° out there,” I said, “I really don’t wanna go outside.” “I don’t.” she said. What? “I don’t go outside. I open the door and let her out.” “Excuse me,” I said “What do you mean? We have to take her out … Continue reading I’m hungry, whined the dog. And I gotta pee.
Okay, so one’s stoned, the other’s a total witch. Honestly. So Abby the puggle’s mental state is deteriorating, not terribly surprising for a 14 year old. Add the fact that she’s mostly blind, almost completely deaf and her honker works only at close range, and she’s a pathetic little pup. But she's still adorable and so … Continue reading The Dog’s a Stoner…
Go, you big fierce cousin of the lions. Go annihilate that vile gopher. And all his relatives. Chase them so they never darken our street again.
Examining Misadventures 