“What do you mean,” demanded the cat, “Puppy weekend?!”

Me: Exactly that! We’re puppy sitting! Hooray!! Cat, furious: I thought we agreed, no more animals! Me: Quite the contrary. After Miss M went to college, I offered a choice of rodents and you declined both. Not my problem. Cat, coldly: Either a guinea pig a small human could saddle and ride or a horde … Continue reading “What do you mean,” demanded the cat, “Puppy weekend?!”

Beloved smiled, inclined her head at me and confided, “She’s marrying her goddaughter.”

Conversation stopped dead at the dinner table, a group of us Episcopalians sitting amidst a very crowded room of Catholics at the local Friday Lenten Fish Fry, and all turned to stare at me. “Okay… maybe that could be… phrased… differently?” Turning to the group, looking at their stunned faces, I realized everyone seemed to … Continue reading Beloved smiled, inclined her head at me and confided, “She’s marrying her goddaughter.”

“We need another animal,” remarked the cat.

Slack-jawed, I stared at her. “You want another dog?!” Cat, impatiently: No. But it’s… a little empty around here. Something else… to… liven the place up a bit. Me: Okay, you know the group leader was petitioning us to take a puppy asap, right? Cat: A puppy… is not… challenging enough. I need to be … Continue reading “We need another animal,” remarked the cat.

Hey! That’s mine! shouted the puppy…

The 17 week... excuse me, 18 week old pup is still with us. Due to unforeseen circumstances, he's probably got another week or so before he goes home. Dog: Hooray! Puppy: A dog who plays with me? I'm so in! But I wanna get back home, too... Cat: Excuse me, WHAT? The favorite game involves … Continue reading Hey! That’s mine! shouted the puppy…

Something’s wrong with the puppy, said the dog.

Our little visitor, another guide dog puppy, is visiting with us while his raisers recover from illness. Our visitor, 17 weeks and a ball of energy. Me, concerned: what do you mean? Dog: he doesn’t do what he’s supposed to do Me: what d’you mean? Dog: he stands when he piddles Me: yeeeeeeeah… Dog: and … Continue reading Something’s wrong with the puppy, said the dog.

Never wear sandals to the dump.

Not that I had a choice, mind you – I wore my sneakers early in the morning, when the grass (which grows about two inches overnight) wept so badly as I trod through, my socks got soaked as well. Dammit. It could’ve been God’s retribution for my sins, which to my mind weren’t so bad, … Continue reading Never wear sandals to the dump.

Sorry, remarked the dog. All outta free cuddles.

Me: what are you talking about? C’mere and cuddle me. Dog: Nope No free cuddles today Maybe tomorrow Me: Tom— what?! Dog: I… can… spell you one for two treaties Sound of paw hitting forehead comes from the direction of the sofa. Cat: SELL, ding dong, I can SELL you one for two treaties. Dog: … Continue reading Sorry, remarked the dog. All outta free cuddles.