Unknown origin: Estás disfrutando de tu estancia aqui?
Me: oh, shit. It’s happened. I’ve lost my mind.
Small voice: you prefer English?
Me: who… is…
Me: Mmmmmmmmisty??
Misty, my aunt’s ancient feline: She said to speak to you in Spanish, but you’d only understand parts of it. You don’t appear to be of substandard intelligence, though, but she was quite insistent.
Me, gobsmacked: who is sh… OH MY GOD.
Misty: are you quite all right?
Me, eyes narrowing: How the blazing hell did MaeMae talk to you??
Misty, still in British little girl voice, despite her 16 years: I’m not sure I can release that information to you. I’m sorry.
Me: what is this, MI6?
Misty, sniffing: Amateurs.
Me: what??
Misty: So… are you enjoying your time here?
Me: Uh, yes… thank you. Now my aunt’s out of the hospital.
Misty: Yes. I’m rather relieved about that. I’ve already had one upheaval, I don’t want another, and she was taking rather a long time to come home.
My aunt recently spent time in hospital and is now home, on the mend, thankfully. It coincided with our visit so we were able to help out a little; Granny stayed at the house and fed the cat, and we took turns on the visiting rota at the hospital.
Me: Mmmm. Yes. At some point, we’d need to do something different if she was going to take a longer time healing.
Misty: I can’t very well go with either of your cousins, can I? One has a dog who wants to eat me and the other has a cat who… well… (casts her eyes downward)
Me: What’s wrong with Georgie-puss?
Misty: oh dear. I shouldn’t have said anything, but you know, she’s… um… very shy. Anxious. And my diet is rather restricted. It would be too difficult keeping my meal plan with another cat around.
I snorted. Misty was taken in by my aunt a couple of years ago after her dear friend passed. Misty came complete with endowment to ensure she could continue eating her special, spectacularly expensive meals and would have vet care in future.
Me: this was why you kept patting my leg to get bits of fish after we went to the chippy last week?
Misty, raising herself up to her full, rather petite height: Omega 3s. I do not get enough so I must request them when I can. It’s not easy when you’re not permitted to speak in a language humans can understand.
Me: yeah, about that…
Misty: …
Me: …
Misty: …
Me: seriously. Why? Why us?
Misty: this will sound cliche but if I told you I’d have to kill you.
Me: <<snort>> You’re like five pounds. I’m… uh… multiples of that. Good luck.
Me: oh, shit. Never mind.
Examining Misadventures 