Me: I know, right? I love the puppy but right now, this respite care is such a blessing. Cat: beg pardon? It sounded like you said respite care. I think you meant to say “no more dogs ever”. Me, snorting: you wish. Not sure how long she’ll be with the puppy sitter but until we … Continue reading “Thank god” said the cat, “peace and quiet again.”
The cat paused. “Well. Isn’t THAT special.” I stared. “How the HELL do you know SNL’s Church Lady?! That was in the 1980s!” MaeMae the cat just shot me side eye. Puppy: no I mean REALLY special Me: How d’you mean? Puppy: Well I went to church today and I listened to Miss Julia talking … Continue reading “Am… am I special?” Asked the puppy…
Me: MaeMae! What have you got? The cat didn’t shift her gaze from the flower pot. Me: MaeMae! Struggling with the puppy, I tried to see what the cat had cornered. Miss R, the guide dog puppy in training, strained to get to the cat. Me: MaeMae! What are you doing? Cat, not breaking her … Continue reading “You’re mine now…” said the cat with an evil gleam.
Puppy: Muffin Me, prying her jaws apart: You have something in there. Puppy: Muffin I got muffin Cat: I believe she's trying to say "nothing" while you have your hand fully down her throat. Me: You were chewing on something... I sighed, let the pup go, then spied something that looked like a sliver of … Continue reading What are you chewing on? I demanded.
Me: what do you mean? MaeMae the cat: you are suspiciously nervy. Looking around, MaeMae saw certain evidence… Cat, breathing in sharply: no. NO DON’T YOU DARE DAMMIT! Me: I don’t know what you’re talking about. OWWWWW…. This is a couple days old but damn that cooking fat bit my arm so hard it bruised. … Continue reading “Why are you so fidgety?” Demanded the cat.
Southwest, easyJet, JetStar… what the heck? Is that like a bargain paint color as well? We took JetStar from Auckland to Wellington… that was an experience. Never flown with a 29” seat pitch before. Zowie… if you’re taller than 5’5”, I strongly recommend you find another carrier or at least pay for the exit or … Continue reading Why do cheapo airlines use orange?
Cat: you and who else? Treble, the dog we're sitting, blinked. Dog: you of course your head nearly touched mine Cat: Because I was watching to make sure you didn't attack. Dog: We met in the middle of the bed your sweet lizard breath on mine Cat: Gross! You realize you heave carbon dioxide more … Continue reading “I can’t believe it’s almost over…”sighed the dog, “we had a beautiful night together…”
My grandfather was a wonderful man, kind, generous, gentle. On one topic, however, there was no budging the man... and I suppose I get it, he served as a British captain in the Great War ("Did I march down the quay to the ship to cross the Channel? Good god noh, my deah, I rode... … Continue reading Our doggy visitor is remarkably like my grandfather.
Beloved jumped out of bed. Crap! Is that MaeMae? Me: chance’d be a fine thing. Beloved: Shut up, honey, you know you love that cat. I snorted. Like I love going to the dentist. The cat streaked along the fence, screaming “INCOMING!!” Flinging herself into the house, panting, el feline was shaken up. Cat: F😳ccccck! … Continue reading GET OFF, DAMMIT! Screeched the cat…
MaeMae: oh sh🤬t, WHERE?! Visiting five month old puppy, Miss A: oh my gosh!! A TALKING Chihuahua! Miss A MaeMae, looking around: what? ME?! I’m a cat, you dingdong! Miss A: Are you KIDDING me? A Chihuahua ca… MaeMae: don’t. You. Dare. MaeMae, glaring at me: for Pete’s sake, can’t you find dogs that have … Continue reading “Oh my GOSH!” Shouted the visitor. “A Chihuahua!”
Examining Misadventures 