Miss M had done another one of her overnights away from us - this time with the amazing puppy raiser who is going to keep her while we’re away on vacation. This woman and her mom are saints. Our beloved guide dog puppy is... challenging at the best of times. Miss M with another dog at … Continue reading The dog was beside herself with happiness.
Cat: A medium what? Dog: you know… a medium Cat: no, you are NOT a medium. You’re so not psychic, you sometimes don’t seem to know when you need to pee until it’s an emergency. Dog: no you don’t understand I got a medium Me: She’s wearing a medium guide dog puppy vest. Cat: Sheeeeeeet … Continue reading Dog: I am a medium!
That’s actually apropos of nothing, but my mother said that’s the kind of book that would grab my aunt’s attention and cause her to read it. She evidently likes intriguing starts. So Beloved wasn’t completely enthusiastic about my latest musical endeavor (I tend to make up songs, and what I lack in artistic ability I … Continue reading “Hell…” said the dog, as she climbed into bed…
The cat snorted. Future tense? I sighed. I did not say you’re going to be DAFT, I said. You’re going in the bath. Cat, rolling her eyes: How can you become something you already are? Dog (confused by cat): but… but.. I’m not IN the bath Cat: Case in point. Me: Knock it off. Puppy, … Continue reading But… why am I going to be daft? Said the dog, confused.
The dog scowled at me from the stairs. Having struggled against getting her vest on, she was now waiting for me to get her to the door so that we could go for a morning walk. I, however, was not about to say the magic word: “Come!” which results in a three treat bingo. Because … Continue reading I am a federal official, I said, and I can neither offer nor solicit bribes.
I raise my head off the pillow and looked over at Beloved. “It’s 38° out there,” I said, “I really don’t wanna go outside.” “I don’t.” she said. What? “I don’t go outside. I open the door and let her out.” “Excuse me,” I said “What do you mean? We have to take her out … Continue reading I’m hungry, whined the dog. And I gotta pee.
Blondie’s home and it’s not my neighbor’s wife she’s coveting. She rather fancies a pup and Miss M is, frankly, charming. I’m gonna be checking the trunk before she and her boyfriend peel outta the driveway. Blondie just read that over my shoulder and muttered “we wouldn’t keep her in the trunk…”. Okay, I’ll be … Continue reading The Dog’s in Danger
We all, actually, have a case of cabin fever. We had a bit of a scare nearly two weeks ago as one of the puppy’s classmates came down with a puppy illness after attending class. However, our puppy went to class with her, then to class then next week. Right after the second class we … Continue reading The dog has a fever. It’s bad.
Life in our house at the moment is like having warring teenagers except one is goofy, eager and innocent and the other is bitchy and worldly. Dog: sorry I peed on floor again. Me: That’s okay. You almost had a perfect day, and we were having a dinner party. Try again tomorrow. Cat: Stupid animal. … Continue reading Puddles and Cuddles and Jealous Felines
The entire country’s domesticated animal population didn’t consider me a corpse, but they thought as much of their respective owners. Time change is a bitch. However, if she gets exhausted and wants to nap earlier… heck, I’m down with that. One of the evil, super-slippery knee-busters. She also keeps growing. It’s getting harder to hold … Continue reading The puppy was convinced I was dead.
Examining Misadventures 